Thursday, May 5, 2011
we used to be friends
Have you ever taken a multi-vitamin on an empty stomache? I used to be healthy and take multi-vitamins at breakfast. But one night I had quite a few tacos and woke up the next morning still too full to function. So I took the Centrum to make up for the nutrients I was missing from my usual oatmeal and banana. I washed it down with a Diet Coke, of course. Then I called my dad because I had something important to tell him. And then things got weird. It must have been midsentence when I said "Oh no. I'm dying." Dad, a little confused, tried to ask why it was that I was seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. The only response he got was a moan and gargle. I hung up the phone, thinking maybe I should have said a final good bye? And the next thing I knew I woke up on the carpet next to the bathroom. I'm assuming my thought process went from "This is the end" to "I need to get to the bathroom NOW" to "Nope, still dying" and then a loss of consciousness. After waking I ate some toast and fully recovered. But it was too close a call. No more vitamins.
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