Monday, December 30, 2013

All the honeys who making money, all the mommas who profit dollas

I'm normally a mom who works from home. This Christmas break, however, I've been a Working Mom. I'm doing some consulting, so I've been spending my days in an office and listening to zero episodes of Sesame Street. 

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a refreshing change of pace to get dressed before noon and talk to other adults. But I'd also be lying if I said I didn't call Stephen to check in every forty-five minutes. Not because Stephen is incompetent as a parent, but because I have separation anxiety when Ivy is more than three feet away. It should be noted that Ivy does not share my affliction, and, as we've recently discovered to my horror, is actually much better behaved when I am not around. 

"Um, she never whined while you were at work," Stephen said while Ivy clung to my leg and made that "ehhhhh" noise that means "I'm dissatisfied with life in general right now but I can't articulate why. Regardless, it's your job to fix it."

Serious career face in a serious career workspace.

So maybe the time apart is good for us. Ivy is learning some independence. I'm relearning the satisfaction of a challenging career. But I'm also looking forward to getting back to pajamas and Elmo and spending my days with the tiny human who makes me a little crazy and a lot happy. 

I better go call Stephen.

Friday, December 27, 2013

That one time I got a a new family member

What? Another recap post?
Yes. Because my brother got married. That feels like something that should be documented.


Because we're the family of the groom, we, or I should say my mom, planned the wedding dinner.
Obviously, we held it at a bowling alley. I spent the night taking photos because I'm the cheapest photographer around (free).

The bride and groom.

My mom had T-shirts made. Of Course she did.

At one point a child threw up.

There were toasts. I bawled through mine. I just love my brother. And his new wife. 

The night was a roaring success, as was the next day.
Nick and Ashley were sealed in the Salt Lake City Temple. It was totally lovely. 
Then we all suffered through mild hypothermia while waiting for the Mr. and Mrs. to arrive outside. 

These are iphone photos. There was an actual photographer capturing the Wedding Day moments. 

There they are. Totally worth the wait and the frost-bitten toes.

Best dress ever.

You can tell by that dress that Ashely has impeccable taste, so it's no surprise that the reception was gorgeous.

Ivy and I with the now-married Nick.

Fresh snow and Christmas lights greeted the guests who were then invited inside a cozy hall for tomato soup, grilled cheese and hot chocolate. And if they were lucky, they got a glimpse of a glam two-year-old.

Ivy loved the dress, the shoes, the wrap and even the tights. On a normal day I'm lucky if I can get a diaper on her. But on this wedding day, she was all for getting gussied up. 

And for dancing:

Thanks for the fun party, Nick and Ash. Welcome to the married world.

Thursday, December 26, 2013

Warning: Holiday Recap Post

Part of what's fun but also kind of crazy about being married is the doubling of Christmas traditions. This means, if both families live relatively close, like ours, that it's important to be twice as many places. Over the past week we drove the hour between the Walter and Morley homes more than should be legal given the Utah air's inversion tendencies. Sorry, coughers.
It was totally worth the commute though, since both the Walters and the Morleys turn Christmas into a Holiday Extravaganza-a-a-a-a.

It started with the annual Walter Christmas Eve lunch at Hire's Big H. I ate enough onion rings to feed an onion-ring-loving-nation for a year. And for the first time in Ivy's life, she ate what we ordered her. That grilled cheese was a Christmas miracle.

Then we headed to Provo for Grandma Jan's Christmas Eve party. After more food (e.g. enough shrimp and cocktail sauce to feed a shrimp-and-cocktail sauce-loving-nation for a year, we enjoyed the circus program. It starts with the nativity, wherein an adult reads from Luke 2, pauses for carols sung by a group of relatives whose voices combined sound not very great, and grandchildren dress in an assortment of bathrobes and fairy wings in order to act the parts of Joseph, Mary, Shepherds, Angels and Wisemen. 

Note Brock crying. Hahahahahaha

After a quick costume change, it's onto Santa, a reindeer, and a couple elves who hand out gifts. 

After the cousin festivities wrapped up (Christmas pun!) We spent the night at the Morley's. It was a weird Christmas for my parents. My brother is on his honeymoon, my sister is on a mission, so Stephen, Ivy and I were the only youths in sight. It was quiet. We missed the absent siblings. But more jammies for us, right? 

Ivy's thrilled.

Ivy still hasn't quite grasped the concept of opening presents. It takes a lot of time and a lot of help, then when she finally gets one open, she's totally content to play with whatever book/toy/shirt lies within.

But we did eventually make it to the grand finale: The Kitchen (c/o Nana and Bop Bop). I'm convinced this will be the gift that keeps on giving. Ivy is obsessed with pulling out every utensil in our apartment, hiding them under couches, dipping them in dog food, and breaking off their handles. She also likes to stand approximately four centimeters away any time I'm holding a pot of boiling water or opening the oven door. I think this toy will go a long way in preserving both my cooking tools and my child's safety. I hope, anyway. 

After talking to Hermana Morley via Skype (She's doing great and looking great, which is infuriating for a former Sister Missionaries), we made our way to Centerville. 

Because I'm an idiot I didn't take any camera photos in Centerville, but trust me when I say we were spoiled rotten, like a banana that's been in the bottom of the fruit bowl since October rotten, with gifts and food. I know there's a lot of Tsk Tsk-ing about too much emphasis on presents, and that we should all be more focused on The Reason for the Season, which, yeah, is probably true in my case, but I was overwhelmed by the thought and love that went into each gift for me and my little family.  I felt incredibly grateful for family. And if I had to guess, I'd say Jesus be on board with that.

Speaking of boarding, Mimi and Papa got Ivy her own Metro set.

Choo, Choo, everybody. And Happy New Year.

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Ya Filthy Animals

Monday, December 16, 2013

The best thing to ever happen to democracy

During last night's Gingerbread building sesh, no one cried and there were only a couple structural collapses, making this year the most successful in Morley Family history. Please vote on your favorite so one of us can lord it over the rest of the family for the next 365 days.
The nominees:

Demolition Derby

The Lincoln Memorial

Travel Trailer

Clock Tower

Walter and Skyler White's Home


The Eiffel Tower

Which candy creation reigns supreme?

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Are you listenin'?

What's up, blog?
Sorry 'bout the neglect.
It's been too cold to blog. It's been too cold to do anything, in fact.
It's 20 degrees today, and it's a balmy paradise compared to the negatives we've been waking up to lately.
We've watched Finding Nemo 5 times already this week. It's only Tuesday. Morning.
My child, who usually begs and pleads to go outside, won't step foot out the door declaring, "Si. Co." (Cold outside). And it's like, if we're not leaving the house, why bother getting dressed? So Ivy hasn't worn pants in days. I have, but only because I have to take out the trash.
We're in CO for for 14 days between Utah trips. Utah, by the way is a lateral move in terms of escaping bitter temps. 2 weeks is just enough time to do laundry, finish up some home-made gifts (worst idea ever) and pack. It is not enough time to recover from the previous drive during which we saw a diesel trailer blow over. Driving is the worst. How is teleportation not a thing yet?
I'm obviously in a terrific mood. Winter. Woof.
Which leads me to the tidings of the Season!
This is possibly the least amount of effort I've ever put into a holiday season. Here are all three of our decorations:

I bought some paper to make snowflakes. I haven't opened the packaging.
I dunno. It just doesn't seem worth it if we're not even here on Christmas Day. Or the preceding couple of weeks. So really we're just putting off all celebrations until we're back in the Mother Land. 
The mother land that promises Gingerbread House building (get ready to vote), Hires Big H eating, and wedding attending. Did I mention that my brother's getting married? My brother's getting married.

Aren't they cute? Ashley (Nick's fiance, duh) is a total gem and just what I would order if Sister-In-laws were available on Amazon. 

In other news I've had three gingerbread cookies today. 

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

See something say something

You know my neighbor who called the police because I was "knocking on the walls"? The neighbor who sends a letter of complaint to the home owner's association every week? The neighbor who asked me to get her mail for her and then accused me of hiding half of it? I've gotten really good at avoiding her. I once spent fifteen minutes hiding behind a dumpster when I spotted her outside.  I park on the other side of the complex so our paths won't cross. I tiptoe past her apartment to get downstairs.  And if I hear her door open, I run. 

But today, for the first time in a year, I found myself facing her. I must have been distracted by helping Ivy up the stairs because I didn't her the lock turn. So before I had a chance to sprint away, she stepped outside, a mere foot away from where I stood. I froze. And then I had  to make a choice.  Keep walking and acknowledge our mutual hatred. Pretend to be blind. Or smile and say hello. In the spirit of making amends, I chose the latter. In turn she averted her eyes and strode away.

At least she didn't yell? At least she didn't yell. 

Merry Christmas, neighbor.