oh he's just a friend

When you are three years old and Mom asks what you would like to name your new pet goldfish, take moment to reflect on the names that have meant most to your toddler existence. If it were one fish you might say Elmo, Snuffalufagus, or maybe Mr. Hooper. But there are two goldfish so the decision is obvious. Watch Bert and Ernie swim gleefully around their clean bowl. Carry the bowl in your stubby arms while you and the fish explore the house and slosh water on the carpet. Let Dad help you sprinkle the flaky powder on top of the bowled water, and giggle when Bert and Ernie head for the surface and gulp the floating food. Believe Mom when she tells you Bert and Ernie are just taking a nap with their bellies up. Believe her again when she says Bert and Ernie are going for a swim via the toilet.