Thursday, April 4, 2013

Oh, the Places You've Been!

Today is your day!
You've been to great places!
To go and to stay!

You've tried all the local treats
French fries, tacos, and shrimp.
You've been chowing the grub
like a super food pimp.

You look up and down the menu. Look it over with care.
To the waiter you say, "Burger, medium rare."
With your head full of dreams and a large appetite
you're too hungry to even attempt  to eat right.

And you don't think twice
about all that pink
the under-cooked beef
and that cheesy weird stink.

Your tummy, it rumbles
performs intestinal tumbles

You ignore it of course
and go on your way
you'll be fine with some tums
and some time to digest, you pray

But then things start to happen
in the middle of the night.
You sit up with a start
Pale, eyes wide with fright


You've been to the cafe
And to the taqueria
And now you've been hit
with some bad _________

You don't look behind as you run full speed
if it were a race you be in the lead.
To the bathroom you head, to the porcelain throne
and as you throw up you think "I'm dying. I'm done."

You've been poisoned by food
it seems that fate can be rude

I'm sorry to say so
but, sadly, it's true
and e-coli really
can happen to you.


  1. that is horrible. But a seriously amazing poem.

  2. this is the most beautiful thing I've ever read about such a horrific betrayal.

  3. I am shocked, horrified and impressed!

  4. I love this. I work with your mom and absolutely LOVE her too. Great blog!

  5. Rough. Sorry it happened to you! This is a hilarious poem. :)


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