Dr. Ivy Answers

Stan in Michigan asks,Dr. Ivy- Is it better to be feared or loved?

Dr. Ivy says,
The answer to your question, Stan, is entirely dependent on context. Feared or loved by who? If we're considering your relationship with a rattle snake, it's certainly better to be feared. But if it's a bunny, it's better to be loved. Unless it's the Monty Python bunny. If it's the Monty Python bunny it's you who had better fear and run away. RUN AWAY! When it comes to other homo sapiens, however, it's not so cut and dry. I find a little bit of fear and a little bit of love a good balance makes. In my three months of life I've learned that most of the time it's best to goo and gaa and giggle to be adored by my aquaintances, but every once in a while I throw a fit so that Mom Dad and Dog know who's boss. It's me. I'm the boss. Love me. Fear me.

Love,

Dr. Ivy

Dr. Ivy, The World's Most Trusted Expert

She has a future on Broadway and I have a future in cinematography.

Jim ate it

I have been looking for a good embroidered blue USA cap

I'm usually pretty good at recognizing a scam. I've never given money to a Nigerian prince, I never answer the phone when it's an area code I don't recognize and I never open mail that says I'm pre-approved for anything, so I don't know how the representative from VacMax 30000 ended up in our living room. A complete lapse in judgment I guess.The woman who called to set up the appointment promised a $500 gift card just for letting a sales guy give a presentation. I figured it would be a 10 show and then we'd collect our reward. However when the tattooed, wolf-smiled salesman was 45 minutes into his pitch, I  realized he would probably never leave and we'd have to pull out the air mattress and find some spare linens. Luckily, by some sort of miracle he realized that we're renters, in law shool and not in any sort of position to buy $3200 vacuum. He was unhappy, to put it lightly, that he'd wasted his time and breath on a couple of good-for nothings, and couldn't huff of here fast enough. But he did leave the promised $500 gift card. $500 to www.GoShoppingMall.com. Let's look at what I can buy, shall we?

Note:



Looks like I'll get my holiday shopping done early this year, and only pay $300 in shipping!

To add insult to injury, Stephen really wants a VacMax 3000.

Movie Review Monday But Actually Thursday

More like Meryl Streep The Batty Old Hallucinating Lady Who Is Also Pretty Mean. I was looking forward to learning about Maggie T's time as Prime Minister. I'm still looking forward to learning about it someday but I'll have to find a book or something because this snoozefest did little more than make me wonder if I was the only one who thought Julia Childs and Margaret Thatcher had suspiciously similar voices. I swear 70 minutes of the film was her wandering around her house talking to her dead husband, and the remaining time was filled with news clips from the 80s.
Since our viewing, Stephen has found every oppirtunity to mimic Ms. Streep's accent and proclaim, "Never Compromise!" and it sounds very much like this:

Also why I can't live in Florida

Aside from starvation and oppressive governments, I think the greatest injustice of geography is that there are people in the world who have to live where camel spiders exist. If you've never heard of camel spiders DO NOT LOOK IT UP. You will never sleep again. But then I guess my fear of arachnids, insects and the like is greater than the average person's.
Once, when I was just a tiny person, my mom heard a blood-curdling scream come from the downstair's bathroom where I was. She expected to find a flesh wound or armed robber. Instead she found me fa-lipping out over a fly. A common house fly. It was just too much for me to handle. And while I'd like to say I outgrew it, well, I didn't. In fact last night I really had to use the restroom but I knew that there was a moth roughly the size of my head lurking in a corner of the shower. So I held it. All night.
If you threw me in the Indiana Jones pit of snakes, I'd be totally fine. but if it were a pit of spiders, or moths or even rolly-polly bugs, I would immediately give up the will to live. It's that bad.

You can follow the bowling live radio station on twitter

To celebrate our two years of weddedness, we bowled. Not because we're ironic hipsters, but because we legitimately enjoy bowling.
The Longmont alley is everything you would both hope and expect it to be. It smelled strongly of stale hot dogs and was all but empty save for a few seriously suspicous characters.
Stephen's a pretty consistent bowler, and I actually kept up the first round. But it wasn't long before I had to switch to the six-pound child's ball just to avoid throwing gutterballs. #upperbodystrengthfail. So yeah, Stephen won, blah blah blah, and I eventually sort of gave up and just focused on figuring out what exposure works best in flourescent light.

Ivy makes a great cheerleader.

For our romantic dinner I made this:

I probably should have plated this better.

I found the beef broccoli recipe HERE. So tasty. Yeah, I had to buy a few wacky ingredients, but I'll for sure make this dish again because what else am I going to with oyster sauce? Not use it as an air freshener I can tell you that. #thestuffreeks.

#heightdiscrepancy #tryspellingdiscrepancywithoulookingitup